Day 093: Please advise

Posted by manang.inasal on November 22, 2017 at 11:15 AM

I badly need some advice here please.
I seriously don't know what to choose.

a.) Condo (1 bedroom unit - preselling)
- Prisma Residence (SMDC) located in Pasig
- have to pay Php9,000.00 every month until April 2023
- After April 2023, will have to pay Php20,000.00 for 20 years or Php23,000.00 for 15 years (bank financing)

b.) Car (7 seater)
- have to pay Php160,000.00 as downpayment
- have to pay Php17,000.00 - Php 18,000.00 every month for 5 years (bank financing)

Kelangan ko ng kausap about this matter.

Sobrang adulting

Gold-Copper-Sodium

Posted by cinderellaareus on November 20, 2017 at 07:03 PM | under: Monday

I was given 50 raffle tix that I need to sell for our yearend party. Yung iba 100 tix kinuha so how can I complain? I learned that selling tix is not as hard as I thought though. Well, it's hard, but not so much. Ang supportive din kasi ng friends ko. (Thanksie, Schwarze! *wink wink)

....

Since kailangan ko magbenta, i asked him too.

Z: Hello R! May raffle ang club namin blah blah blah. Mayaman ka naman bili ka na!

With a liittle pa-cute here, pa-funny there and a few more hahaha's, in the end, he bought 5.

And hey, don't judge me. I need to sell the tickets!!! 

Char.

Huling effort ko na to. Pag di mo parin kinagat, Gold(Au)-Copper(Cu)-Sodium(Na)! T_T

...

...

*sa mga nakagets, credits goes to the owner.

Aminin mo, ang witty. Helium Helium Helium!

I don't know

Posted by cinderellaareus on November 18, 2017 at 11:35 PM | under: Saturday

So where did my Saturday go? 

It's 11:03pm and I'm yet to pack my stuff. Just bought a luggage worth 6k for the price of 1.5. Not bad, right? 

KCON in a few days. Excited naman ako pero tinatamad akong mag empake. Hindi ko rin nilu-look forward na matutulog ako sa ibang kama. I need at least 4 pillows to sleep. Will they give me 4 pillows?  Should I bring my own? Dalhin ko narin kaya yung bed ko? Dapat siguro ang kaartehan e binabagay sa budget no? Asdfghjk. 

-------

Saw that kuya aleks served as a judge for a spoken-word poetry contest. Hanggang ngayon ang galing nya pa rin. I remember all his works back in college. Ung short story nya na  "Senyal", yung stageplay na sinulat at dinirect nya na "ambon ng kristal". These were not good peices. Heck, these were superb pieces. I saw that he made more plays way after college. Syempre hindi ko napanood. Bakit ba wala ako sa mundo ng taong to? On top of that, he's a licensed ECE. 

Pag nangarap ka daw at Hindi ka kinabahan, Hindi daw high enough yung pangarap mo. 

Pag nangarap ka daw at Hindi ka kinabahan kahit sobrang taas na, delusion daw kasi yun. 

Pero pag nangarap ka at kinabahan ka. Then, you're in the right place daw. 

I know the world I'd like to be a part of. Nagwawala talaga yung puso ko pag naiisip ko yun. Pero ano bang gagawin ko? 

Dapat siguro hinahunting ko si kuya aleks kaso nahihiya ako. 

Chicken. 

Dissect

Posted by cinderellaareus on November 18, 2017 at 03:19 AM | under: Monday

1:40am. Got home about an our ago and i feel like overanalyzing things, so let me.

Delivered my bsp10. Got 1/3 yes. Meaning, kailangan kong ulitin. I was surprised na hindi naman masakit. I actually felt sorry for my evaluators because it looked painful for them. 

Ang weird no. Bakit hindi masakit?

Wala ung isang supposedly evaluator ko, so mentor tookover. Sya ung nag-yes. Feeling ko nga ayaw nya talaga mag yes pero ok narin kasi mukha naman akong kawawa kung 0/3 ako di ba?

Ang weird parin. Bakit hindi masakit?

Erika and Gabby said no. Erika was her cutsie nicey self and I saw how painful it was for her pero mejo kinabahan parin ako sa mata ko kasi it felt warm like it was on the verge of leaking tears. Yun lang naman talaga ang issue ko. Ayoko lang umiyak don. Tingin ko yun lang talaga.

Then Gabby was his usual self. I knew he wouldn't show me mercy. Kaya nga muntik ko ng ipa-frame ung finill upan nyang BSP7 ko before na pinasa nya. Pero pag si Gabby wala naman nung effect na tulad nung kay erika. Feeling ko nga kahit mag exchange pa sila ng sinabi same parin ang result. Hindi kasi ata talaga yun sa kung ANO ang sinabi kundi sa SINO ang nagsabi. 

Mejo natuwa narin ako na tapos na. Ni-sched ni Gabby ung repeat ko sa January pa. I have more than a month to procrastinate.

Tsaka kaya rin siguro hindi masakit kasi masaya rin ako na nandyan sila ulet.

Nandun ung 2 mentees ko. Nakakatuwa. Sana ung relationship saken ng mga batang to e maging katulad ng relationship ko sa mentor ko. Pero feeling ko masyado yatang mataas na ambisyon yun. Kay mentor kasi, lagi kong nasasabi sa sarili ko na, "jeez, how did I get so lucky?" and it's not even about what i can get and learn from him. It's more on how he treats me and makes me feel. Hindi ko maisip kung pano mararamdaman yun ng mga mentees ko for me. Iba naman kasi kami ni mentor. Pero sana manlang, kahit pano maging close ako sa kanila.

Natutuwa rin ako kay leian. Ang sweet nung taong yon. Minsan lang tumataas rin yung kilay ko kasi pinili nya ring mentor yung mentor ko. Pero normal na selosa lang naman kasi talaga ko. Pero ok na. Dahil sweet sya saken, I'm willing to share na. Basta, wag masyado close ahhh.

Feeling ko yung level ng pagiging possesive ko e pang 2 years old. Lel.

---------

Naisip ko noon na siguro maliit lang ung puso ko. Kasi paisa isa lang ako magkagusto. Nakapikon ung taong gusto ko ngayon. I noticed him before dahil sa mga qualities nya similar Kay R. Nakakainis lang na pati yung mga bagay na ayoko Kay R,  nasa kanya rin pala. Talaga bang pag parehas ng zodiac sign, magkaugali? Si Shara at si Bea Libra rin, bat parang anlayo naman ugali namin?

Parang Hindi tuloy safe.  The guy I liked before him is someone not healthy for me.  When I saw the guy again, biglang parang may danger sign. Lalo pa't namiss ko rin yung taong yun. Shoot. Don't want to go back there. I want someone I can keep. Kakalimutan ko na nga kahit ano pa preference nya e. Basta Hindi taken. Yun n nga lang nirerequire ko e. Kaya siguro konting ingat muna, until safe na.  Sabi nya tuloy lip service lang ung sinabi kong miss ko sya.  OK n rin.  Saka ko nalang iko-correct any mga misunderstandings pag safe na. 

Guilt

Posted by chronicwind on November 17, 2017 at 11:28 PM

There is literally nothing wrong in my life

but

why am i so unhappy? 

kerokeropi

Posted by cinderellaareus on November 16, 2017 at 03:14 PM | under: Thursday

i look like a frog. even makeup cannot cover the damage.

it's been a while since i last had a crying fiesta, my eyes sear. it was never for a reason as silly as this one.

Gabby sent this message to club's group chat yesterday.

minsan hindi ko alam kung sadyang mahal nya lang ba ko or may galit sya saken. lel. i actually asked.

hindi naman ako nape-pressure. natatakot lang.

alam ko namang sabaw pa yung speech ko pero nisend ko na kay ivan. tinatamad narin kasi akong ayusin tas wala narin naman talagang oras. lahat naman ng comment nya agree ako. alam ko narin naman bago ko pa pinasa, pero parang pag galing sa iba yung mali sa gawa mo parang iba yung impact e no. nanapak. ganun. lel.

ewan ko.

siguro kung kami kami lang, or someone from the club lang mag eevals saken, keri e.

ok lang naman.

kung sasabihan ako na magrepeat... well, masasaktan ako. pero makakamove on din ako. di ba humans are made to recover naman talaga.

pero kasi.. wala lang. nakakahiya kasi. nakakahiya na nag effort pa si gabby na mang imbita ng evaluators na, hello, contest champions lang naman... tapos sabaw lang pala yung idedeliver ko. yung feeling na sasayangin ko lang yung oras nila yung pinakamahirap i-handle para sakin. ayun lang naman.

last night, i asked the Heavens to help me. sabi ni Bo Sanchez, pag may hihingin sa Diyos daw, hindi dapat na nag be-beg. kasi anak ka ng Diyos e. bakit ka magbe-beg. ask and believe that you will recieve. ganun lang daw.

but it's hard to believe na ibibigay Nya nga kung minsan ka na Nyang binigo. yung huli ko kasing hiningi sa Kanya, hindi Nya naman binigay. ang hirap talaga maniwala e. kaya sabi ko nalang, "Oh sige po, give me a hug nalang." hindi ko rin alam kung binigay Nya ba.

i went to bed last night at 1030. slept at past 11 na siguro, then woke up 0130. i tried to write another speech because the one i wrote needs a total overhaul. hindi rin kinaya ng powers.

pero kaninang umaga, sinubukan ko nalang ayusin yung existing speech ko. hindi parin naman maganda. pero hindi na siguro kasing sama.

iniisip ko pa yung new members kasi baka hindi nila nakita yung mga prev speech ko na ok naman. pag nakita nila yung sabaw kong speech. nakakahiya lang. well, ok lang naman. iniisip ko kasi baka magsisi yung mga members na pinili akong mentor pag nakita nila na ganito kasabaw ako mag speech.

ok. ang praning ko no?

hindi ko pa nasisimulang mag memorize. absent si partner. ang busy sa cage feeling ko nga hindi na ko makakalabas ng buhay kanina. lel. pero naayos naman lahat.

pero nakakatuwa rin na may mga taong nag bother na kamustahin ka if buhay ka pa e no. Andre sent me a message saying goodluck sa speech ko and that nagulat daw sya sa line up ng evaluators ko. nakakatuwa rin yung batang yun na twing merong nakakapanic na pangyayari sa club, nangangamusta at nag-ooffer ng tulong. kahit loko rin yun paminsan minsan, naa appreciate ko parin na ganun sya.

sabi nila what cannot kill you will make you a better person. siguro magiging super better person na ko after this.

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